Feel Safe with Marvel Avengers as Nesting Dolls

• These are Officially Licensed Avengers Nesting Dolls!
• The Hulk, Thor, Iron Man, Capt. America and Nick Fury
• The dolls range in size from 2"- 4.5"

First off, I know I calmed down when I saw that these Avengers' Nesting Dolls are licensed. I worry a lot when I buy Nesting Dolls that they might be cheap knock-offs. The last thing I want, when I am in my zone, stacking and unstacking my Nesting Dolls, is to think that a large corporation is not getting their share of money from my purchase. That sort of thought can intrude and basically ruin my training.

Yes, training.

I am a competitive Nester, someone who stacks and unstacks Nesting Dolls at competitive matches, for money. For those new to the Nesting world, yes there are a lot of speed competitions, but there are also overall events where you are graded on: technique, style, one-handed, blindfolded, paralympics, etcetera. My specialties are left-handed Speedstacking and Stackdancing. Stackdancing requires you to do a dance routine around a table whilst nesting a variety of dolls that are usually themed based around the song.  (I did a Goo Goo Dolls routine in 2014 that is still legend in the community.)

I won the 2007 EuroNest Championship for Speedstack, and was third place at NestWorld in 2008, but now that I am older, I cannot compete with the new generation. However, I am usually ranked in the top five in Stackdancing. Not bad for a three-nippled ginger from Spitoonsville, Pennsylvania whose Amish parents were lactose intolerant, gender dysphoric dairy farmers.

Now the reasons why I love these Marvel Avengers Nesting Dolls are plentiful. The first and foremost reason is that they are so unnecessary. Superhero nesting dolls are so unneeded, inappropriate, so deliriously over the top, that I get so happy about these. I just want to just cover myself in mayonnaise and roll around a bed of macaroni until it's time for a picnic.  (But I promised myself, never again!)

The next reason is they are so representative of a falling empire, not quite fallen, that they cause me to have schadenfreude for the mind-space that is Hollywood, California. Soon Hollywood, your time will be over, and Ronan Farrow shall be King, and these colored suppositories cannot repair the damage you have done, silver screen emperors that hungered for golden trophies. Superheroes as nesting dolls is a sign their creativity is bankrupt. Sure, it makes sense to have the characters of the near-comedy New Girl  as nesters, because of their preciousness, or the female co-stars in Tom Cruise action movies due to the fact they are all gorgeous but also utterly forgettable, but the Avengers?  Please!

I could go on and on, but now is the time for rating these dolls!

Using Amazon Prime Rib's heroic rating scale, with its troubled origin story and special effects action wizardry, we give these dolls a solid 5 out of 5 Bezos, because... there are 5 nesting dolls here.